That's Fit

Would you loan your husband out to a single friend for the night? Let a friend in need use your car? Invite house guests to stay for an indeterminate amount of time? Though these may seem like generous sacrifices you can make for friends and family that you love, a marriage and family therapist at Canadian Living lists them as some of the six sacrifices you should never make.

Why? Because these kinds of sacrifices invite trouble. An accident may wreck more than your car, it could wreck your driving record. And sharing your house can lead to stress and damaged relationships. And doesn't everyone fight about money at some point in their life? Though it feels rewarding to help people in these big sorts of ways, think long and hard, says this therapist, before making a sacrifice you just might not be able to afford (in more ways than one).

I think that much of it boils down to trust. There are friends for whom I'd do almost anything, because I know without a doubt they'd never take advantage. But those are people in my innermost circles, not even just good friends or acquaintances.

What do you think about these six sacrifices? Do you think she's right when she says that people should never make them, or do you think there are instances when you just need to help another person out?

Have fitness questions? Fitz has your answer. Our ThatsFit.com fitness expert -- and now your own virtual personal trainer -- will help you get fit, increase your overall health and do it in a fun way. Drop your questions here in the Comments section below and we'll choose one per week to publish on That's Fit! Learn more about Fitz here.

Q. Hi Fitz. My husband and I totally disagree on the topic of pizza. He's says it's "unhealthy garbage," and I say it's not so bad. What do you think? Stacia

A. I think it can be both ... depending on how you make it. Let's just start with the main ingredients: flour, marinara sauce and mozzarella cheese. Flour if it's white, is not perfect, but not the worst thing in the world either. Marinara sauce which is tomato based is pretty great; full of lycopenes. Cheese is high in fat which is bad, but also high in calcium which is great. So! Our dilemma is choosing the right ingredients which will make pizza more good than bad.

Have fitness questions? Fitz has your answer. Our ThatsFit.com fitness expert -- and now your own virtual personal trainer -- will help you get fit, increase your overall health and do it in a fun way. Drop your questions here in the Comments section below and we'll choose two per week to publish on That's Fit! Learn more about Fitz here.

Q. Dear Fitz, My husband makes a big stink when I give our kids any type of 'sugar candy' like gummy bears or bubblegum. The kids are totally skinny and I don't see what the big deal is. They are kids! What do you think? Christy

A. Hey Christy. Your husband is a freaking genius. That's what I think! He has the insight and thoughtfulness to know that as parents, you should be teaching your children the best habits possible. He knows that your children are less likely to eat nutritious things when they've had a dose of candy. They're more likely to deal with the pain and terror that comes along with having their cavities filled if you give them candy. They're more likely to struggle with their weight and other less than lovely issues later on in life if you don't instill high standards in them today.

I'm literally a sobbing crying mess as I write this. I fell in love with a dying man a few weeks ago when I caught wind of him giving an amazing gift to his students, colleagues, friends and family at Carnegie Mellon University. Randy Pausch, a computer science professor gave his Last Lecture now famous on YouTube, on September 18, 2007. Randy's lecture was called "Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams." Now, I have my own spectacular husband, but I imagine anyone who knows, or knows of Randy . . . would love him very much.

For a man whose pancreas is being destroyed by a cancer that could take his life within months . . . he was hysterical, energetic, inspirational, and relentless about the idea that life can be wonderful every day, and that his days still are. He told stories of his childhood and made one of the most insightful statements I've ever heard. "Are you a Tigger or an Eeyore? Choose!"

Fitzness Fiends is a section devoted to you, the reader! We all have learned so much on our path to becoming more fit, and now it's time to learn from and inspire each other! Fitzness Fiends are constantly working to better themselves. Some are perfect, some are not. All have health on the mind. Please send Fitz your answers to these questions with a photo of yourself. Time for you to be the motivator!

Name: John Alvira

Age:54

How often do you exercise? Four days a week.

What type of exercise do you do? Nordic Track

What gets you to workout, even when you're feeling lazy? Always knowing that it benefits me, and that I will see results after.

Have fitness questions? Fitz has your answer. Our ThatsFit.com fitness expert -- and now your own virtual personal trainer -- will help you get fit, increase your overall health and do it in a fun way. Drop your questions here in the Comments section below and we'll choose two per week to publish on That's Fit! Learn more about Fitz here.

Q. Ms. Fitzness, I stopped smoking five months ago and have put on about 1.5 stones (21 pounds)! When is the best time to try and diet? I don't want to try and do too many things at once. I exercise regularly as I have my own horse and am always out and about. Thanks in advance, Lisa

A. Hey Lisa. Congratulations on your success getting rid of smoking! Smoking is one of the absolute worst things one can do to themselves, and your decision to quit is one of the best. Hooray! I'm literally doing a little 'happy dance' here at my laptop for you.

Now for your question about when you should begin dieting. Easy answer. NEVER! Never diet, lady! Diets are temporary behavioral changes that only lead to temporary results. Screw that! You are in this for the long term, sister, and no diet can last forever. What to do then? Gradually become more and more deliberate about what you put in your mouth. Seek out low fat, low calorie, high nutrition type food. Before you decide on any meal or snack, ask your self which would be the healthiest choice. Trade french fries for a baked sweet potato. Choose grilled poultry or fish over hamburgers. Find some calorie free beverages you enjoy as well.

Have fitness questions? Fitz has your answer. Our ThatsFit.com fitness expert -- and now your own virtual personal trainer -- will help you get fit, increase your overall health and do it in a fun way. Drop your questions here in the Comments section below and we'll choose two per week to publish on That's Fit! Learn more about Fitz here.

Q. Help Fitz! I'm mortified, because when I asked my husband what he wanted for Christmas today...he answered, "something sexy"! I could die! Fitz, I'm about 40 pounds overweight and could not squeeze into anything sexy at all. Christmas is about four weeks away. How do I lose weight fast? Marcy

A. Oh my Marcy! I think you're confused here. It sounds to me like you don't have to do a darn thing for that man of yours to think you're sexy. Since he specifically asked you for a sexy gift, he already wants you bad! Nice going. In fact, if I were you.....I'd be feeling really great about myself right now. Start thinking in terms of an actual gift.

Lingerie doesn't always have to be super slinky. How about a cutesy little elf outfit? A little velvet and fur are always racy this time of year. Maybe you can sign the two of you up for Latin dancing lessons? Hace Calor! A weekend away, a couples massage, body lotions, and adult toys obviously fill the sexy requirement as well.

If you want to lose weight Marcy, do it the right way. Change the habits that led you to gain 40 extra pounds in the first place. Start eating highly nutritious and lower calorie foods. Exercise daily as well. But, you don't need to do a thing for that man to think your sexy. He wants to have fun with you. Hooray! Let him! Just keep this in mind. Leary, uncomfortable, and miserable are not sexy qualities.....even on a supermodel. Confidence, energy and passion are always hot. I normally don't say this, but I wish you a very Sexy Christmas! Fitz

Q. What's up, Fitz? I'm hosting a small holiday party for a few close friends next week. I'm totally in to fitness and always eat really healthfully, but some of my friends do not. Am I going to seem like a total loser party pooper if I don't serve them crap food? I just don't want to bring that greasy, sugary junk into my home. Nonetheless serve it to my friends. Have any suggestions? Rey

Jennie Garth, formerly known as Kelly Taylor on FOX's 90210 and current contestant on ABCs Dancing with the Stars, has whipped her body into tip-top shape with all her recent fancy footwork.

"I've lost weight and I'm looking great," she says.

She may not keep her slimmed-down figure for long, though, because she's pretty sure she'll have another baby.

Garth, wife of actor Peter Facinelli and mom to three young daughters, says she secretly looks forward to being pregnant again. Why? "So that she could eat and have ice cream," says her hubby.

Before she focuses on family, Garth, 35, must first finish her ballroom competition. It's down to five dancing couples. Could Garth win it all?

Do you have a healthy marriage? That term can describe emotional states or physical ones, but on the physical side, it's been found that if one spouse changes, the other might too.

In other words, spouses with healthy partners may become healthier as well over time. Want to stop eating so much fat and want to walk every night to get exercise? Perhaps your husband or wife will follow you and both of you can get healthier at the same time.

The study mentioned here was quite interesting, and should make married couples think a bit. How are you when it comes to being healthy? Has your spouse joined you freely or with begging?

Have fitness questions? Fitz has your answer. Our ThatsFit.com fitness expert -- and now your own virtual personal trainer -- will help you get fit, increase your overall health and do it in a fun way. Drop your questions here in the Comments section below and we'll choose two per week to publish on That's Fit! Learn more about Fitz here.

Q. Fitz, I'm a stay-at-home mom who is very active with a small child. I feel like I need to be doing more exercise, but going to a gym or taking an hour for myself during the day isn't a reality. How can I get more exercise in with my daily routine? Thanks in advance, Carrie

A. Hey Carrie. I'm feeling your pain. With two little ones of my own, it definitely requires strategic planning to keep fit. Even though I own a great gym, I utilize the local health club because of its amazing childcare program. Not only do I get to accomplish a great workout, but I get an hour of 'me time' which offers a priceless break in my day. I wish you had the same luxury.

However! If that isn't a reality for you, it just isn't. There are plenty of opportunities for fitness at home. Either plan to workout with kids or without. Training with kids could be running with the jogging stroller, or cycling while towing your child in that towing trailer. (What is that called?) You may also just jump in with them and dance to a Wiggles video together sometimes. "Doing the Monkey" requires plenty of energy, and hey.....it's something right!

On the days we don't go to the gym, I make great use of their nap or rest times and workout here in the house. I suggest investing in a piece of great home cardio equipment. A treadmill, stepper, or elliptical trainer can provide you a super workout at slow or fast paces, at any time of day in any kind of weather. Other easy things to do at home are jumping rope, push-ups, dips on the floor, lunges, squats and crunches. You can do those exercises which require no equipment throughout your day. 40 push-ups in the morning and squats at lunch. Easy as that.

Owning a variety of fitness videos is a brilliant plan as well. Not only can you do them on your own, but I find that children seem eager to take part with their parents. Get a variety of videos that appeal to you, and pop one in whenever you can. They're truly designed for folks in your situation. The need to exercise at home.

Parenting certainly does make 'me time' more difficult, but staying fit is one of the most generous things you can do for your children. They're going to want you around for a really long time! Fitz

Q. Dear Fitz, My fiancee and I want to work out together to look our best for our wedding next fall. We don't want to be stuck lifting weights or on a machine alone. Can you recommend some ways we can partner up to get fit?
Jamie & Jordan

I posted two blogs a while back, Hey Smokers! This is what your friends won't tell you! part 1 and part 2, and got a firestorm of comments. Lots of defenders of smoking, and of course the ones who despise it. One interesting thing I've pulled out of it, is that people are comparing it to drunk driving. To me, the topics are two different beasts with some similarities. I 'm one of the despisers of smoking, and now even more than ever before, I am a despiser of drunk driving.

Two weeks ago, Lieutenant Corey Dahlem, our family friend and hero from the Gainesville Police Department in Florida was hit by a drunk driver and killed. Corey was on a street that was closed for the University of Florida National Basketball Championship celebration. The festivities were winding down, and Corey was on the road to make sure none of the student and local partiers were. A drunk male, age 20, drove through the police barricades and struck Corey. Two motorcycle officers had to jump from their bikes to avoid being struck as well. A few blocks away, the driver was stopped and had no idea why he was stopped. He later blew a 2.4 on his breathalyzer test. Almost three times that of Florida legal limit. (Corey, far right, was photoraphed the night he was struck, congratulating UF students on their teams victory).

Corey was a humble man, hard worker, and spectacular father, friend and husband. If he and the other officers were not on that road at that time, dozens of civilians would have been killed before the drunk stopped. Hero is an understatement. Two thousand people mourned his loss and celebrated his life at his funeral. A lesson on parenting was preached by the stories of how Corey ate lunch at school with his kids several times a week when they were little. At 18 and 21, he was still cooking them meals and driving his daughter to college.

All the jokes and sitcom situations making light of couples fighting over one or the other's snoring habit may not be so funny after all: a recent study suggests that snoring not only interferes with getting enough sleep, for all people involved, but can also tear relationships apart. And sadly, the two play off each other -- lack of sleep making both parties tired, irritable, and less likely to be interested in intimacy.

There are treatments for chronic snoring, including everything from simple earplugs to more drastic measures like surgery. Experts warn that splitting into separate bedrooms should be viewed as a temporary fix for a problem like this one, and both should agree on a clear "plan of attack" for returning to a shared situation as soon as possible. For many couples, the time spent catching up on the day and visiting with each other while getting into bed is some of the only "alone time" they get all day.

So if this is something you're dealing with, be proactive! Don't let a little snoring action ruin your relationship.