This month was pretty important for my little family; my son's adoption was finalized. I first started thinking about adoption nearly five years ago. Then, in the summer of 2005, I hosted a boy from Russia for the summer. I tried to adopt him, but before I was able to a Russian family took him in. Though I was heartbroken, I knew he was OK and I was happy that he was placed in a loving home in his homeland.

When the Russian adoption fell through, I decided to adopt from the US foster care system. It was hard switching gears, but I was excited and ready to try again. 10 months later I was matched with an energetic, funny, and athletic 10-year-old... my son. He moved in with me last June. The past 10 months have been the most challenging and rewarding months of my life. My son tests me daily, but he also stuns me with his resilience and wonderful qualities.

While things are sometimes harder than I expected, there is very little that we've gone through that I hadn't learned about through research or from my agency. One thing that that took me by surprise, however, was the depression I felt after first meeting my son and after he first came home. I had always thought post-adoption depression (PADS) was a bit of a myth. After all, there are no pregnancy hormones involved and, after finally adopting after a lot of effort (because very few adoptions process without tons of effort on everybody's part), how could you possibly feel depressed?

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There are many reasons in this world to lose weight, and just as many motivational factors as well in many cases. In one of the strangest but warmest ones I've seen in a while, a man recently had gastric bypass surgery performed in order to adopt a four month-old boy.

The man previously weighed 558 pounds, but had trouble adopting the infant due to a Missouri judge that prevented him from adopting the boy. Why? Because he was obese.

Although the man claimed the judge who decided the adoption discriminated against him, Gary Stocklaufer decided to lose quite a bit of weight and prove the judge that he was capable of, well, losing enough weight to convince the judge that he could become a fit adoptive father.

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Couples and individuals have been turned down in their attempts to adopt a child because of their sexual orientation, because they smoke and now because they're too fat? That's what happened to a 278-lb woman in Australia -- wannabe mother Kylie Lannigan was told to lose 115 lbs.

What do you think of this ruling? I can see both sides -- on one hand, obese people have more health problems than those at a normal weight. They're prone to more illnesses, have a much shorter projected lifespan and most likely don't have the energy to keep up with kids. They also most likely don't have a healthy diet or get an acceptable amount of activity, which could lead to unhealthy habits in their adopted child, too.

And yet, if someone was denied the chance to adopt because of something like their ethnic background, it provoke a zealous outrage that they were being discriminated against. So how is this any different?

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There was a time when your unhealthy habits were your own business. Those days are gone, I suppose, as demonstrated by this story, which was originally posted on our sister site, Blogging Baby. The story is about an English couple who were told that they could not adopt until the husband gave up smoking and provided a Doctor's letter to prove it. The husband claims that he only smokes in the garden shed, but apparently that is not sufficient and he must give up his20-cigarette a day habit within 6 months. The couple are heartbroken and, after many years of fertility treatments, frustrated as well. I don't blame them.

It doesn't seem fair, does it? They could be great parents, but one unhealthy habit has come between them and their desire for a family. It's also a bit scary that your health can be used against you to determine whether you're a suitable parent or not.

What do you think?

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