Finding Empowerment to Lose Weight

I saw a post on Facebook from a friend of mine the other day. She was talking about how some random stranger came up to her in the grocery store and told her that maybe she ought to eat less and exercise more. Please understand, my friend is several months pregnant, not overweight. But regardless, I can't believe someone -- a complete stranger no less -- would come up to someone else and say that!

I've never heard of this actually happening. I've witnessed the occasional mistaken "when are you due?" comment. I've had people look at my plate and say something about it. But never anything this sinister.

It got me thinking: What do you, the skinny, really think about us, the fat people? Do you judge us? Do you feel sorry for us? Do you want to help us? Or are you sickened by us? Do you find us grotesque or disgusting?

I've heard the comments you make when you think I can't hear. I've seen how you look at me. I hear the jokes you make about us. I am a bit of a "class clown"; I should be able to take it. After all, fat people are supposed to be jolly, right?

Maybe you mean well. Maybe you think you've got that right thing to say that will set me on the golden way to health. I wish you did have that perfect formula. I wish you could change me. But unfortunately, I've heard it all before. I know what you're going to say before you say it.

Your comments seem so innocent! You don't mean any harm. Things like, "She has such a pretty face" or "You're pretty agile for a big guy" or "Could you be Santa for our Christmas party?"

Maybe I just need to lighten up. I know you're not out to get me. I should have a thicker skin, and not let stupid little things get to me.

But this blog is supposed to be about my journey. A place to share what I'm feeling -- what I'm going through while trying to lose weight. And while this is the "most wonderful time of the year," it's also the most difficult time of the year. My daily routine has been gone out the window -- and with it my healthy eating and exercising. I can't keep up, and therefore I've gained back those two pounds I lost last week.

The skinny person says to just not eat it. Show a little self-control; a little will power. I get that, deep down in my soul I understand it. But I'm not following through. I'm embarrassed by my lack of ability to make lasting changes. Why don't I exercise more at home? Because I'm embarrassed to have my family see me flopping around. How stupid is that?

It's good to write this down. Cleansing for the soul, I guess. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day. Maybe I can commit now to making good choices tomorrow. One day at a time. One meal at a time. I've got to remember that I am wearing smaller clothes now -- and that didn't just happen by accident.

I literally just saw something sitting on my counter. It's a little stress ball thing shaped like a man flexing his muscles. I think it's a little giveaway from some company. But his shirt says, "You're empowered!" Wow, talk about your smack in the face. Preach on, little stress ball man.

I can't worry about what other people think about me. I can't dwell on if they're disgusted at me or making fun of me or watching my gut bounce around while I exercise. I can't rely on other people to change me. I'm empowered to change myself. No one else can or will. In the time I've written this article, I've gone from completely down in the dumps and angry at myself to the exact opposite. Amazing. I'm glad you were here to see this. Maybe tomorrow will be a good day.

What did my friend in the grocery store do? She told that stranger what she thought of her and didn't hold back. She got a high five and a "you go, girl" from the cashier. And a virtual high five from me. She knew who she was and knew that she didn't have to put up with that garbage from someone else. She was empowered!

After decades of dieting only to gain it back, two That's Fit readers have decided to finally rethink their relationship with food and exercise over the next year to move toward a lifetime of fulfilling, healthy living. Come by every week as Ashley and Lee share their successes and challenges as they tip the scale.