10 Foods To Avoid

From 'How to Eat Like a Hot Chick' by Jodi Lipper and Cerina Vincent

We are so excited to share our Hot Chicks tricks with you! We know that you're already hot and that you have the potential to be and feel even hotter. And we promise that when you start eating like a Hot Chick, you will be loving life and having a hotter heyday than you ever thought you could. Start by reading this list of messed up foods you should avoid.

1: Maple Syrup
It comes from a tree, but one tablespoon has over 100 calories and you probably use six times that per pancake. That's 600 calories just in syrup! Always use the real stuff -- not because it has fewer calories, but it tastes more intense and tree-like, and you'll probably end up using less. Pour one or two tablespoonfuls onto the side of your plate, stare in horror at how small a portion that is, and learn how to dip.

2: Chex Mix
This stuff is delicious. But think about it -- why, under normal circumstances, would a handful of cereal, a few pretzels, and a bunch of crusty old bread chunks be so tasty? We'll tell you why: because it's coated with a stick of butter and a giant heap of salt. A tiny handful has about 150 calories and half of those are from fat. Gross. If you really want to eat a stick of butter, make like Carrie and go get a delicious cupcake or something, but don't eat it on your cereal.

3: Eggplant
We know that many of you think you're being smart when you order an eggplant parmesan sub at your local pizza place. It's a vegetable, so it's gotta be good for you, right? Not so fast, girls. Once it's breaded, fried, and slathered with cheese, eggplant ceases to be a vegetable at all. It is now a giant sponge whose sole mission is to soak up as much grease, oil, and lard as possible and deliver it directly into your cute little bod.

4: Honey
Like maple syrup, honey is all natural, and many health-conscious ladies pour buckets of it into their tea on a daily basis (except for you super-vegans who feel bad about stealing from the poor little bumble bees). Well, we don't give a crap about bees, but we do care about you, and we want you to know that honey has about 64 calories per tablespoon! A few squirts out of that giant plastic bear and your herbal tea is now equal in calories to a can of Coke. Not what you had in mind, is it?

5: Ketchup
Okay, ketchup isn't that bad for you. It's only got about 15 to 25 calories per tablespoon, which is relatively low. However, you should know that the commercial brands contain mostly sugar, or else it would taste like that terrible tomato paste, wouldn't it? Just be careful about how much of this stuff you use. A few blobs on a veggie burger is fine, but a whole cup of it with a plate of french fries is just gonna add to your problems.

6: Tortillas
See our Mexican restaurant section [in 'How to Eat Like a Hot Chick'] for more on this, but for now suffice it to say that a giant flour tortilla can add upward of 200 calories to your burrito or even that healthy wrap. That wouldn't be such a big problem if these things had even the tiniest bit of taste! But tortillas are as bland as can be. You might as well try sucking down two cups of flour for a similar effect. Our solution is to perform a simple surgery on any food that comes to us wrapped. We eat the innards first and then eat the tortilla last and only if we're still hungry. And when we see that giant unrolled thing on our plate, we're usually not.

7: Mayo
You probably know that this stuff is bad for you, but you most likely don't know exactly how bad it is! Mayonnaise actually has 90 calories per tablespoon! That is equal to eating another entire apple for every knifeful that you spread on ... whatever you spread it on. Plus, mayo is just gross egg-yolky nonsense, so you should probably stay away from it even in small quantities.

8: Rice Cakes
Wait a minute! Rice cakes are diet food, aren't they? Well, yes, but they're also a giant waste of your time. They have about 50 calories each, but they do not fill you up at all, unless of course you eat the whole bag. But if you're gonna go and eat the whole bag, you might as well eat some real food, right?! And please don't try to convince us that you actually like rice cakes, because we simply won't believe you.

9: Bubble Teas
This trend seems to be fading, thank goodness, but we still have to mention it. First of all, it is not hot to suck down slimy, gelatinous tapioca balls in your beverage! But putting that aside, these drinks are even worse for you than those frapp'd coffee concoctions. They usually have between 325 and 450 calories each, which is like adding another meal to your day. We say, save the $5 they ridiculously charge you for these things and eat some gummy bears or even pudding for dessert if you're into this jelly crap.

10: Canned Frosting
It's got 75 calories per tablespoon, and when you make cupcakes you probably end up eating half a cup right out of the can. If you're gonna indulge, skip this processed, trans-fat-filled nonsense and make frosting from scratch. It's easy and the real stuff is so delicious that you'll be satisfied after just a few licks of the beater. (If you're lacking self control, go ahead and make those cupcakes anyway, eat one, and bring the rest into work the next day. You'll instantly be hot and extremely popular.)