Surgically-Implanted Tongue Patch For Weight Loss?
Categories: Diet & Weight Loss
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| Photo: SeenyaRita, Flickr |
It's a bit of mesh that you can have surgically implanted in your tongue that helps you lose weight by making eating painful, acting as a constant reminder that you shouldn't be consuming food. It lasts for about a month, during which time you're meant to rely on a liquid diet for nourishment. Apparently, you can expect to lose between 15 and 30 pounds in a month, which is not surprising considering you're going a whole month without eating solid food. Inventor Dr. Nikolas Chugay, who brazenly calls this a 'miracle patch,' proudly boasts that 10 patients have undergone this procedure and have seen "impressive results."
Seriously? Even for the most desperate of dieters, there has to be a better way than paying good money for pain. As Canadian obesity doctor Yoni Freedhoff told The Chicago Tribune, "I'd say the Chugay tongue patch is a daily reminder of how just because your physician has an MD behind their name it doesn't mean they're bright."
The only real way to lose weight and keep it off? Diet and exercise are absolute musts.
Click on the gallery below to see more outrageous (but non-surgical) diets that people resort to for rapid weight loss.
Fad diets are so alluring with their promises of fast weight loss and their skinny celebrity followers. The problem is that they're often unhealthy and make outrageous claims that are untrue. Here's a roundup of the some of the most strict and downright ridiculous diets around and the famous names that champion them.
Crazy Diets
By Jennifer Fields and Mary Kearl
Fad diets are so alluring with their promises of fast weight loss and their skinny celebrity followers. The problem is that they're often unhealthy and make outrageous claims that are untrue. Here's a roundup of the some of the most strict and downright ridiculous diets around and the famous names that champion them.
Going Bananas
Eat bananas for breakfast and lose weight? That sounds easy enough. But the Morning Banana Diet -- such a craze in Japan that grocery stores there can't keep the fruit in stock -- involves a little bit more than just eating this favorite breakfast food. On this plan, which is supposed to boost metabolism, you'll eat one or more bananas with room-temperature water for breakfast and have an optional snack at 3 p.m. You can eat anything you want for lunch and dinner. There are no desserts, dinner has to be eaten by 8 p.m. and you have to go to bed by midnight. Does it work? Japanese opera singer Kumiko Mori announced on a TV show that she lost 15 pounds using the Morning Banana Diet. The creator's husband is also said to have lost 37 pounds. We're not sure those two instances count as solid proof of its effectiveness, but this diet certainly rates high on wackiness.
C is for Cookie
We like the sound of any diet that involves eating cookies and promises you'll lose 15 pounds in a month. Sanford Siegal, M.D., is the creator of the Cookie Diet in which followers eat six of his specially formulated cookies along with one meal a day. It's not surprising people lose weight on this diet, considering they're eating a mere 800 calories a day -- a calorie count so low that experts would classify this as a crash diet that is not sustainable. We classify it as just plain crazy.
Dubious Cure
Kevin Trudeau's book, 'The Weight Loss Cure,' made HCG a household name. HCG, a hormone extracted from the urine of pregnant women, is used to treat reproductive problems, but injections of the hormone are also thought to curb appetite. We suspect any weight loss might be the result of the 500-calorie-a-day diet you're supposed to follow on the plan, not necessarily the self- or doctor-adminstered shots. The FDA denies weight loss claims about HCG, but the hard-to-find shots are still widely sought after. Aside from the obvious ick factor, there are some intense side effects including water retention, mood alterations, headaches, and high blood pressure. Men who receive the injections may get positive results on pregnancy tests.
Part-Time Diet
Who wouldn't go for a diet that promises you can eat whatever you want and as much as you want? But the s have more than one third of your daily sodium allowance. 'Alternate-Day Diet' by James B. Johnson, M.D., has a pretty big catch: You can only indulge every other day; on alternate days you'll be eating a mere 200 to 1000 calories total. Switching between overeating and starving sounds like torture, but does it work? A review published in a 2005 issue of the 'American Journal of Clinical Nutrition' found that non-obese followers of the plan did lose weight on the diet, but they reported high levels of hunger and irritability that would likely prevent this from becoming a long-term plan.
Pain in the Rear
Sure, the Martha's Vineyard Diet calls for mud treatments, but following it is no day at the spa. You'll also be drinking most of your meals and enduring weekly colonics and enemas. Robin Quivers does look great since she tried the detox, but with all those trips to the spa, this diet is heavy on the pocketbook and light on lasting results.
Diet in Vein
Any diet that requires a test of your blood type raises our eyebrows. And depending on the results, you could be stuck shopping for an all-veggie diet or one where the main component is veal. Why? the Blood Type Diet claims certain foods react differently with various blood types. A better idea than eating politically incorrect meat? Cut back on your portions.
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Cuckoo for Coconuts
Another contender in the realm of the single-food eating plan is the Coconut Diet. Jennifer Aniston swore by this plan where you load up on coconut oil (Almond Joy doesn't count), which is supposed to boost metabolism and help you lose weight quickly. Most experts agree you should limit coconut in your diet because it's rich in saturated fat which can raise cholesterol, so it's best to avoid this one.
Funny Face
Voluptuous Kate Winslet swears the Facial Analysis Diet helped her drop baby weight. On this wacky plan, a so-called facial analyst proposes a special diet based on food intolerances revealed in the texture of your skin, eyes and hair. But the only reason this diet ever works is because people tend to drink more water, get more sleep and eat more fruits and vegetables while on it.
Tart Diet
Beyoncé revived interest in the Master Cleanse when she used the juice fast to slim down for 'Dream Girls.' Drinking a mix of maple syrup, lemon juice, water and cayenne pepper for days is hardly a healthy approach to weight loss. Even Beyoncé said she wouldn't advise anyone follow her diet lead.
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)
me 9-24-2009 @ 2:25PM
Wow, 10 whole patients (morons!) have done this procedure!
Why pay for the implant when you can just cut your own tongue at home? If it's deep enough and you don't go to the doctor afterward, it may take a full month to heal. If you're lucky, you may even have permanent damage, and you could get REALLY skinny!
Or... maybe you should get up off the couch and move (not to the refrigerator!).
Reply
marian 9-24-2009 @ 5:11PM
that would not work...mouth cuts heal faster than anything you ever saw...my son cut his cheek from his lip to the other lip running around his mouth...took less than 2 weeks for that to heal...because...your mouth heals so fast...
Firecaptain 9-24-2009 @ 2:44PM
It's not the lard but_'s fault they are fat. It's a genetic defect that causes one's mouth to fly open every time they bend their elbow!
Here's a simple two step plan that guarantees you'll lose weight or better yet never become hippo sized in the first place.
(1) DON'T EAT LIKE A PIG!
(2) GET OFF YOUR FAT AS- AND EXERCISE!
No charge...You are welcome....
Reply
racheldawn1123 9-24-2009 @ 3:15PM
That was very rude. And some people have diseases that make them over weight. Just because you're skinny does not give you the right to be so mean.
abbey 9-24-2009 @ 4:17PM
What a jacka** you are! It is both presumptuous and rude to assume that all overweight people are that way because they are lazy and have no self control. If your brain is closed, your mouth should be as well.
Angelia 9-24-2009 @ 5:39PM
You are a very rude person. What about those of us who cannot even walk due to spinal disease, who would LOVE to get out and walk and go to the gym! I have news for you. I eat healthy, and yet, if you cannot exercise, it won't make a damn bit of difference. You need to get a life. At least I have one.
Inkling 9-24-2009 @ 7:21PM
My adivce to you is:
1. Shut your pie hole
2. Grow a brain
3. Learn how to have a conscience
4. Learn how to think about how cruel your remarks are and how biased your thinking is.
There are plenty of overweight people that cannot exercise because they have health issues that are not related to diet or lack of exercise. Many people are not able to exercise due to work related injuries. As the human body ages, those injuries become more painful and the body naturally reduces it's metabolism. Just because somebody is overweight does not mean they are lazy or stuffing their face all of the time.
nascardawn20 9-25-2009 @ 12:10AM
firecaptain? I seriously, SERIOUSLY doubt that. Anyone as rude as you has no business even claiming to be a fire captain. With a job like that, you should have more compassion for another human-being. Youre nothing but a complete lying azzhole,IM CERTAIN OF IT.Captain Jackazz! I truly hope you die and burn in hell.
jezme 9-25-2009 @ 1:15AM
Dear Firecaptain....I think you may have sprung a leak in your hose...obvious mental problem going on there...save your insults for someone that thinks you have something worth listening to... your not too impressive on this board...plus you are boring..yawn.
Cathy Herold 9-25-2009 @ 2:30AM
I agree with FireCaptain. Although the statement could have been worded a little more nicely. There are a few exceptions for people who suffer from diseases and are immobile; however, the facts are that over 60 percent of Americans suffer from obesity and being overweight Most of them do not have medical excuses for being overweight. Obesity is killing people and draining our resources for healthcare. Avoid the meat and dairy products that contain hormones. Stop eating processed foods. If you cannot afford organic meat and dairy, give them up completely. I did. I have no more cravings and I've lost over 20 lbs. I exercise too. If people would just put down the food that is killing them in this country and exercise regularly, we wouldn't even have a healthcare crisis.
CINDY 9-24-2009 @ 2:45PM
There are plenty of people out there that are WILLING to try ANYTHING in order to lose weight!!! This procedure may seem a little drastic to some, but I'll bet they get alot of takers!! Some people have tried EVERYTHING ELSE!!! And everytime something new comes along, they're so DESPERATE to lose the extra poundage, even if it means PAIN, they jump at the chance!! I feel kind of sorry for these sorts, but they do exist!!!
Reply
durpadoo 9-24-2009 @ 9:47PM
It's paying for pain. Just keep eating, that way, at least the pain tastes good.
greenflea8 9-24-2009 @ 2:55PM
What ever happened to the less painful jaw wiring, or how about liposuction? Pills? And what happens once your tongue is healed and you can eat solid food again?
Reply
lynn 9-24-2009 @ 3:11PM
to the person who says"get up off the couch and move-not to the refrigerator" is a skinny ass and always has been. She/he has no idea what it is like to be heavy and has had no problem with their weight EVER!(ok maybe 5 lbs. and they think its the end of the universe) Did u ever stop to think that there are a good percentage of fat people who do move, who do not gorge themselves on crap, who try their damnedest to lose weight, only to have it return back double fold. Did ya stop to think some fat people are just meant to be fat. FAT people are so desperate to fit in and not be judged and made fun of that they are willing to risk life and limb. People are tying up their insides for God's sakes. Why wouldn't they mutilate their tonques? As a fat person who was tormented from the age of 5 on, i have spent my whole life on diets, doctors, gymn memberships, pills and every f---ing diet in the universe. I am so sick of people who have so little tolerance for others. If the things that were said to Fat people were said to minorities.. they'd be locked up for hate crimes. PEOPLE.....it is bad enough having to walk this earth in a fat suit...Just lay off and thank God u are not in the same boat.Then maybe we can all live and let live and no one has to cut up /out any body parts. Thank you !(fat bastard from Brooklyn)
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Kris 9-24-2009 @ 4:13PM
AMEN!!!!! Well said Lynn!
caged0902 9-25-2009 @ 10:25AM
Nicely said lynn but, maybe we shouldn't lump everyone "overwieght" in the same basket. A good 60% of people popular culture says is "overweight " are really not. i know plenty of "big" people that are pefectly healthy. we are not all the same. no two people on this earth are. so staop trying to make everyone the same.
Inkling 9-24-2009 @ 7:20PM
I have my own opinion about why Americans are becoming so overweight. Livestock feed is treated with chemicals that make them larger and grow at an accelerated rate so they can get them to market faster. We eat the meat. Our bodies process the same chemicals that the livestock ate because it is still in their system. We bulk up just like the livestock did. I've noticed that people are getting larger AND taller. 6 year olds now look like they are 10. Boys and girls are developing at a much younger age. Somebody needs to look into this and tell us the truth. It is not because of fast food, soda, and video games.
tina 9-24-2009 @ 3:19PM
There have been many disgusting treatments that people have tried in hopes of loosing weight. Jaws wired shut, injections of URINE! The healthiest way is to eat less and move more. It's hard to do! If it was easy America wouldn't be the fattest nation in the world.
It's nice to be smaller for HEALTH reasons but let's face it.. most people only want to loose weight to "fit in"... to "look hot" and to be accepted in the world. It's a shame when some people are treated poorly becuase of their weight, color of their skin or beliefs. Also remember, there are vultures out there waiting to pounce on the next big diet craze to scam money out of people that are despereate for some kind of weight loss. I just hope those people wake up and see these IDIOTS for who they are.. MONEY GRUBBING PIGS! They don't really want to help anyone... they just want to take your money! Oh and NO DECENT DR would perform such a stupid thing as to sew a painful patch on a person's tongue!
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Joe 9-24-2009 @ 3:25PM
Wow, Firecaptain sounds like a narrow minded A$$! You just know when people act like that they really have something about themselves that they hate so much they have to lash out in immature ways that show just how uneducated they are. Sorry firecaptain but you just exposed your true UGLY self. lol No amount of weight loss in the world can fix STUPID! lol
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poof 9-24-2009 @ 11:24PM
I actually agree with Firecaptain to an extent. I see alot of overweight people on here crying that they "WOULD LIKE" to excercise or eat less but they ALL have some unrelated underlying health issue that keeps them fat and unable to change it. BULL CRAP! That is such a SMALL SMALL percentage of the population but huge numbers use it as an excuse. Case and point. Go to the grocery right now. Go down the snack food or frozen dairy treats isle. STOP. What do you see? Overweight people that somehow managed to walk out their home-walk into the store and gleefully by hoo hoos. Wont find them in the vege isle. Of course there are the ones that run you over on the scooters because they are to fat to walk down the same isles. I'm supposed to feel as sorry for them? Yea right just like a drunk or a smoker with lung cancer. To boot MY insurance cost has to be sky high to cover this group. Get off the excuses and onto a treadmill. Dont like what I got to say? Well I have lived my life haveing fat people ask me why Im so thin (size 3). I have never asked them why they are so fat.