Welcome to the Good, the Fat and the Hungry. I'm Karla and I have been -- or am -- all those things. Here, I will share with you my lifelong struggle with my weight, and I hope you'll follow along on with my determined attempt to lose the last 40 pounds. I promise to tell you every Wednesday about every win and setback along the way.
I am a single woman, gainfully employed with no children. Even if I were ugly, by most standards, I'd still be a catch. The fact that I'm not ugly makes me an even bigger catch. So why the heck am I still single?

When I was overweight and a man showed any amount of interest, I stuck to him like a barnacle to a ship. I could not be shaken. The thought of anyone being attracted to me at that size excited me to no end, and the lucky man would quickly become the be all and end all of my world. I would call, fax, email, text, even send carrier pigeons if that's what it took to let him know I was interested.

In high school, I was a member of the honors choir. We took a trip to Atlanta to compete for the national title. On this trip I met a guy named Bert. We hung out on the trip and became fast friends. Before heading back to our respective homes in North Carolina and Florida, we exchanged numbers and promised to stay in touch. As I rode back on the bus I gushed about Bert to my girlfriends and the fun we'd had, even hinted at the future we might share. I ignored their giggles and continued with my exaggerated tales.

Finally, I decided to ask them what was so funny. The only one brave enough to say anything said very calmly, "Karla HE'S GAY!" I said, "No way, he's just sensitive." Well, I got back to NC and I called Bert -- EVERY DAY! I called Bert to the point of phone disconnection. My mother came home to find that there was no dial tone. My calls to Bert totaled $800. My mom hit the roof and banned me from the phone. I didn't call Bert after that. I wrote him. Basically, I was a stalker. What's worse is that I was stalking a man who really was, and still is, quite gay.

Fast forward to today and I'm so cocky I don't want to do ANYTHING. I meet men all the time but don't expend enough energy to maintain the relationship. I blame it on my desire to be wooed, but is it fear? I actually dated a man who asked me why I don't call him. I said, "Why would I?" He asked, "Do you think about me?" I said, "Sure." It's almost comical the role reversal in my relationships. They want to cuddle, and I want to roll over and go to sleep. I'm the one to say, "Move over, it's hot! How about YOU get ME get a glass of Kool-Aid, bro?"

My love life is screaming for balance. I can admit that a big butt and a smile have, in some ways, given me the big head. However, the biggest ego checker in the world is family and friends. Oh, and before photos. They remind me that I am here by grace -- not for vanity, but for purpose.

So to Mr. Right: I have put away the notion that you'll ride up on a white horse. But could you PLEASE have a Metro card? I have even accepted that you may not be perfect. But will you please have some health insurance to fix whatever's wrong? I've been standing at the gate looking out long enough. Time to actually get out of the stall. So here goes -- Hi Ho love life, AWAY!