The art of saying "No!"

How come saying "no" can be so difficult for most people? I used to really stink at it, hence I played on five softball teams one summer, further unable to say "no" when each team headed out for post-game drinks. It may have been fun in college, but five barfly nights a week are not healthy when you're actually working for a living.

If you're incapable most moments of an empathic "No!", O, The Oprah Magazine has a few suggestions. Creatively saying "No!" truly is a communication art form:

• To the dinner companion sticking their fork in your face with a sample: My kids have no problem saying "No!" with this one. Try saying, "Absolutely not! I'm getting such a kick out of watching you enjoy it!" or "The bite would be wasted on me, I'm just not a fan."
  
• To the dessert-ordering companions pressuring you to order the chocolate lava cake: Defuse with a different vice: "I think I'll drink my dessert tonight. One more glass of Pinot, please." For the skinny teetotaler, try humor: "I'm that annoying too-full-to-eat-dessert person -- there's always one you know!"
• To a Girl Scout selling cookies: C'mon, you'd say "No!" to a Girl Scout? Buy one box -- give it to a friend if absolutely necessary.
• To the nice-but-not-your-type guy (or girl) asking you out on a date: Be honest here, "I'm flattered, but no thanks." A co-worker of mine used to pull out her famous line, "I'm sorry, but I have to wash my hair this Friday." Not nice.

Check out the O, The Oprah Magazine (July 2008) for the full article, 54 Ways To Say...No! It's a good read.