Join me as I search my soul for direction regarding my latest pursuit: A tummy tuck. Will I go through with it? Will I "Tuck It In?" Keep reading. Keep coming back. And you'll find out.

April 16, 2008

One week from today. Seven days. Tummy tuck day. It's on my mind all the time -- when I wake up in the morning, when I run my few morning miles, when I play with my little boys, when I put my clothes on and take them off, when I look in the mirror, when I go to bed at night. My pending surgery is all-consuming. So is my tummy.

My stomach has bothered me for seven years, ever since my first big baby boy came screaming into the world, ever since that 50 pounds I gained to support his massive weight -- 10 pounds, nine ounces -- melted into saggy skin. It got worse with the second monster boy -- 10 pounds, two ounces -- and then worse again after I lost weight this past year. Don't get my wrong. I love that I was able to carry big babies. I love that I lost the weight that excess food and cancer treatment left on my body. But I don't love my tummy. I don't want to be consumed by it anymore.

I am so excited about my surgery. I'm also so very nervous. My instinct tell me everything will be fine, though. My gut is like my internal compass. It sends me signals all the time about what's right and what's not. It guided me through many cancer treatment decisions. It allows me to put the brakes on anything that might overwhelm me. It cautions me about wrong paths. Right now, though, it tells me I will survive this tummy tuck, I will recover well, I will be happy and healthy and after all these years: comfortable.

One week from today. Seven days. Tummy tuck day. I can't wait.

NOTE: Abdominoplasty is recommended for those whose skin and muscle cannot recover on their own as a result of significant weight loss, pregnancy, aging, heredity, or prior surgery. It is not a substitute for weight loss or an appropriate exercise program. For more information about this surgery, click here.