That's Fit

I am fluffy, not obese..so I can go there..but I can go here...yes, of course, even I am attractive to men who are "average" which means not too fat or not too thin. At first that is..then I get to know them..That tells the REAL story.

What ever you look like, has nothing to do with what kind of human or sub-human you are. Once a person shows their true self do they shine or sink.

Looks fade, personality is the key. Of course this only applies to mature individuals. I think it has a lot to do with how you are raised too. You might have an obese Aunt or Uncle, but you would never say anything hurtful to them, at least I hope. You would treat them with respect, as you should anyone else that deserves it.

Saying that, this world is way screwed up.
That is my story and I'm sticking with it.

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What the author of this article thinks about Catherine Zeta Jones and Angelina Jolie is moot in context of the article being that she is not a man. Nor do I think that anyone really thinks Catherine Zeta Jones is "fluffy" like the soft office bodies women who discuss this stuff have. I like being active. Its not fun being with someone who doesn't push me and have me try to keep up with her sometimes.

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It is hard living in a world that looks down on you if you not a size 6... but the truth is most women wear size 10 or up... because of Hollywood and all the skinny stars the focus is on thin.. but the truth is that thin can be just as bad as the opposite! but people fail to mention that!!! I myself am a plus size person... I have struggled all my life with my self image and weight... my mom has always been a diet addict living from one grapefruit diet to the next... alway's beating me down about my size with negative comments... she was very skinny herself as a young person.. and suffered many health problems... my dad on the other is a large person... not fat!!... large... there is a difference... lets face it some people are just made bigger!!! That DOES NOT mean that we are unhealthy!! regardless of what most people say... I am a VERY active person, I have seen skinny people that are in half the shape I am and I am big... I have come to love who I am... no.. that doesn't mean that there are day's that I look in the mirror and I struggle with myself... but the I focus of the more important things... like um.. well hello! Life : )
society really needs to wake up and stop critsizing plus sized people like us...

I mean... look at Keira Nightly just one of many actresses who are ghostly thin.. that girl would be beautiful if she would actually eat something but what can she say... "oh, I am so great look at my bones protruding from my skin.. that is so sexy." Ha, ha right... Ladies God have us curves for a reason... let's keep them that way and not diet them away!!

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I have lived on both sides of the fence. 2 years ago, I was thin and a knockout. I found and moved up in jobs faster, I was in the lime light of parties and clubs, there were men eager to take me out... and then I hopped the fence. After a horribly complicated pregnancy, and multiple surgeries... I was left with a body that was almost twice what I was before. I do lovemyself, and although you can give me a full body makeover any day of the week... I wouldn't change me for anything. Now, I'm not obese, but there are parts I would GLADLY remove/reduce. However, the difference that I have experienced in how people look and treat you is absolutely crazy. I am very self conscious when I go out to eat... people really like to see what the fat girl is going to order. I definitely don't turn heads when I walk down the street, and I don't get all of the "friendly" conversations that I used to get by man or woman. Its a given that I don't club hop or party like I used to, I am most definite that I would see a change there (no more free drinks and dinner invitations!). But the most effected area has been my career. In a male dominated environment, the promotions come slower, I have to work harder that I used to to get my point across, there is less validity to my ideas, and I don't seem to be invited to the company meetings with clients as often as I would have been. I am not less smart or ambitious becks I gained weight. However, larger people are looked at as sluggish, not well kept, and generally sloppy. If this is how it is in my corner of the world, I would really hate to see how it is on the "mean streets of Hollywood". The truth is that no matter who you are or how confidant you are, looks make the first impression. No one wants a fat girl on their arm or representing their company. Thin IS in, and until society changes that... the thinner you are, the better. Who cares if you have to stick your finger down your throat? At least you fit into that size 0!!

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Wow.. I almost feel like I was supposed to read that last comment from Nita. I’m still in high school and it sounds like I’m going through the exact same thing. My mom, who is thin but not extremely, is always pressuring me to diet, talking about how fat SHE looks, and telling me about how when she was my age, she didn’t even weigh 100lbs. She’s not a bad person; She just doesn’t understand how her comments are effecting me… And my dad is a big man (6ft. 4in. To be exact) and he’s not “fat”… he’s more on the average side , unlike his sisters who are all well into the plus sizes… That’s another thing my mom says… “If you don’t start loosing now, you’ll look like your aunts some day” , which I usually disregard because I love my aunts, no matter what they look like… But the thing is I’m not really that overweight, because I take after my dad… I’m 5ft. 11in. and I wear a size 16! And I love my curves and the way I look, but it’s hard when I’m getting constant criticism.

But back to the subject of this post… I’ve never had any problems with dating because of my size.. But I’m still an attractive person (long, curly auburn hair… blue eyes.. good skin… dimples… you get the picture).. And even though relationships are usually initiated because of a person’s looks, if the two people don’t love each other’s personalities, then it’s not going to work! But on the flip side of that, if, for example, a guy loves a girl’s personality, but not the way she looks, 1. He’s an idiot and not worth the girl’s time, & 2. IT WON’T WORK! But, like I said, I’m still in high school, so I haven’t really experienced how life on my own might be like…Lucky for me, I have the perfect boyfriend now.. =] He’s 6ft. 7in. (not even kidding!) and he’s one of the most amazing people I know! It’s like… he’s one of few people I know that I’m truly, 100% comfortable being myself with, and he’s kind of my best friend. He’s even going to Bible college when he graduates to be a youth minister… So… yeah… the guy out there worth pursuing a relationship with isn’t going to care about that number on the jeans you just bought… He’ll care about who you are and what you want in life… And, in the long run, we’ll all get old and fat later anyways… All the stupid diets, pricy exercise equipment, and tummy tucks in the world aren’t going to change that… So get used to it!

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Listen guys. I cannot believe some of the things the men posted here. I have struggled with an eating disorder for a very long time and have just managed to get myself to a healthy weight where i have my period again. People dont realize that a healthy weight, for women, means you need meat...estrogen is produced in fat and without that you can't get your period which causes seirous health problems and the inability to bear children. A study of the manequins ifound in stores showed that if these were real women they would not have their period. Listen ladies, as hard as it can be, God made you the way you are, your body knows what you need and how much of it so just treat your body well and you will be beautiful!

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Number 3... You started out by saying that the world looks down on your if you're not a size 6. I beg to differ. I AM a size 6 and I get comments from people all the time about how I should lose weight.. and I am 5'8" tall. I weigh 130 lbs.. I wouldn't say that's fat, but it's still 20 pounds heavier than I was a few years ago when I was anorexic. You wouldn't believe the difference in people's attitudes toward me. When I was thin I was complimented constantly, given things, people went out of their way to hold doors for me.... Now that I am "normal" in a size 6 I am ignored, included in the "we need to diet" conversations in the office, comments are made about the amount of food I'm eating... For example.. at Thanksgiving dinner I took MAYBE two bites worth of cherry pie TOTAL after eating a relatively small plate of food and my grandfather (who happens to be overweight) said "I can tell you're not watching your figure anymore. Should you really be eating that?" He also referred to me as a "load" a bit later in the day.

If I'm getting this sort of treatment at my size I can't imagine what the bigger girls are getting. I also want to bring up the issue of the double standard. Why is it perfectly fine for men to be overweight but women have to be UNDERWEIGHT to be attractive? Not just "not fat" but literally underweight! Look at a lot of sitcoms.. the men are big fat doofuses and the women are stick-thin and "perfect".. and if they put on any weight their jobs are threatened (King of Queens).

Anyway, I don't know ANY men who prefer bigger women. In fact, when they're being honest, they will always admit the thinner the better. It's been said that the reason men prefer thinner women is because underweight women resemble a legal version of pre-pubescent girls and men all have a subconscious (and sometimes conscious) desire to have sex with children. Another reason they prefer blondes. Pretty sad when you think of it that way, isn't it?

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All of my life I have grown up with a family of "picture-perfects", my sister is a size 0, my mom is a 2 and my dad is fit and works out constantly. Because of societies pressure to be thin, I would always look at my family and become acutely aware of how I just didn't fit in with them. I'm a bigger-boned girl, I'm a size 14 and at my smallest was a 10. I can't believe when I look at the scale how much I weigh, because I don't feel that I look that way at ALL. I look in the mirror and see a sexy, beautiful girl with the whole world ahead of her. After reading some of the comments for this article by men talking about how they prefer skinny girls I almost feel like I'm missing something when I look in the mirror. Is there some way I should be looking, that I should see this Fat girl?

I've always been told that I'm gorgeous, but I could afford to lose some weight, and all of my life I've been battling with my weight and trying to be health-conscious. Now that I'm away at college I'm shocked by how little I care anymore. I have 3 gorgeous, thin roommates, but rather than feeling like I'm fat and drab next to them, I feel like I can appreciate their beauty and accept that mine is my own.

If some guy doesn't want to be with me because I am average than he's a jerk who I don't need to waste my time with. And neither should any of you! Guys wake up! The average woman today is a size 12-14... the average guy is probably a lot bigger than that!

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fat is not attractive. however, neither is being overly thin. i am an athletic six foot tall twenty year old male. I am more attracted to personality than looks. Having a full face is more attractive then seeing bones poking out. Girls, more importantly then anything else, find someone who is attracted to your personality. dont lose weight to impress someone. if you want to lose weight, more power to you...but do it for your self esteem and health, not just to impress

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Ok.... Everyone has differant taste, I think we can all agree on that... But when I read that someone is more 'attracted' to thinner girls but find heavier ones more fun and have a better personality, I have to think that maybe there are some underlying issues that need to be addressed in his life... Please don't blame the woman's body for your lack of self-esteem or identity issues...

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A few years ago my sister was sent to an eating disorder clinic because she was 5'7" and under 100 lbs. I remeber looking at her and wondering how she could possibly think she looked good. her head (with her huge porn star hair) was twice the size of her body. I thought she looked like a bobble head. Much time has gone by since then, I myself have gained about twenty pounds now 5'9" and 140 lbs, and my sister gained enough to be healthy, and even create a healthy baby. She had a baby about six months ago, the woman looks amazing. some people say too thin but i can't help but burn with envy everytime i see her. I just don't understand how she popped out a child and looks better than me six months later... the pressure of this on me has gotten me to the point where all i can think about is loosing wieght yet all i can do is eat crap. The more i wanna lose, the more i wanna eat. Back then i never understood why she did the things she did to be skinny and now i find myself doing them. I want to stop but i can't, it gets easier and easier to do everytime. And after reading these comments i looked back to when i was 5'9" and 120 lbs. an these women are right... i don't get half as much attention now.. and I AM NOT FAT. i just wish i was thinner.

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It's somewhat unrelated to the topic, but the unfair comment about Keira Knightly irritated me; she's hardly my favorite actress, but she constantly complains about how she can't seem to gain any weight, she doesn't prattle on about how she loves to be thin.

As far as the actual discussion goes, thin is actually a huge fad that started some time after the Renaissance era, it seems like, and is only lasting so long because it's perpetuated by the media. I'm sure lots of people like thin people, but being 'thin' is one thing and only one characteristic. You can be thin and lazy, thin and inactive, thin and athletic, thin and healthy; the same works for anyone who is 'fat' or overweight.


I'm a plus sized girl myself and hardly as active as I should be, but I always get a healthy diagnosis from my doctor and, of all the people I know, I am one of the strongest and most flexible. I don't blame my physique or genetics overmuch for my appearance, either, though it does create a bad platform for me to start on in the first place. I was born 'solid', as my mother puts it, with an hourglass figure (making my shoulders a bit wide to match my hips), a dense bone structure ('I have big bones!'), and a natural inclination to be a touch more on the heavyset side (I take after my dad's mother). Nonetheless, I've had guys that are crazy about me, and I found out that, with minimal effort, I can drop weight pretty easily. I know that the reason I'm overweight is largely due to a lack of self-control - I love sweets. I don't really blame my gene pool for that.

Ultimately, I think people need to start recognizing that being overweight doesn't make someone automatically unattractive or attractive, and the same with being thin. There aren't any simple answers, there's always the matter of perspective, and you can't make a generalized comment about what guys really do or don't like. Some guys are furries, for goodness sake. I think the most unhealthy 'thin is in' fact is that the media clings to it like crazy. Frankly, I think it's borderline pushing pedophilia from some of the 'attractive' people they've shown off. There's a store in New Hampshire I walked past where the mannequins in the window literally looked like ten year old girls, almost, and they had them dressed in nothing more than underwear, since it was a womens' clothing store. That's when things start to get a little odd.

I guess this rambling statement ends on the point that this article is likely more to try and give people either a false hope or just to try and come across as knowledgeable about something that isn't so easy to gauge. Fat isn't just fat, thin isn't just thin, and I think people should stop criticizing either one, when kept to moderation. So long as someone's healthy, that should be all that matters.

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I'm a bigger guy and working hard to remedy that, so I say that it's not really the weight on a girl that turns me off, its the disregard for themselves to change it that turns me off. BTW I'm talking about seriously overweight, like, take the elevator to the second floor overweight. Then they'll sit around and whine about it over a pint or so of Ben and Jerry's, as though that'll help. I guess it's really the fact that they are not happy with themselves and view their own self-worth in the mirror. Sad.

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I believe that skinny-normal sized women do get more attention and should than overweight and obese women. This is because by being a healthy normal weight, they are showing the men that they care about how they look and that they are healthy. Why would a guy want to go out with a girl who doesn't care about herself?

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I've been out with really hot girls who are thin and some with meat on their bones. I tend to prefer the thinner girls as far as looks, but often it's the bigger ones who are more fun and have more personality. With that being said, I'm still more attracted to a thinner woman, which is the main topic of this post.

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I am so sick of hearing people complain about how the world "treats" them for being overweight. Just because a girl is skinny does not make her anorexic. There is such thing as a healthy weight, and a healthy lifestyle - and it just so happens that people who have a healthy weight and lifestyle typically aren't fat... So, yes, the world is going to be critical of overweight people. It will happen because it doesn't look as good, but it SHOULD happen because it just isn't healthy.

You will find a lot of women out there who are thin, in shape, and will stuff their faces at Taco Bell, McDonalds, whatever... but have the sense, the motivation and drive to go exercise afterwards, drink a lot of water, etc...

And I think that although the world might not, the United States of America most certainly caters towards the larger, unhealthier lifestyle - so you really CANNOT COMPLAIN. There are stores dedicated to plus sizes, and trust me, as a small girl it is much harder for me to find clothes that fit me than it is for someone who is a size 10. We are the fattest country (and I am from the fattest state - Texas) so it's pretty much the norm around here.

A girl's size, skinny or heavy has nothing to do with her personality although I think that a healthier girl is probably a lot happier to date than one that is going to whine, complain, and be down on herself because she is unhappy with her body. Unhappiness is a state of mind, and if you can be comfortable being a size 10 than here's to you - just don't bitch about it because that is NOT being comfortable, that is being insecure.

Also, stop getting down on Hollywood, as the article mentions Catherine Zeta Jones, who is also -gasp- in Hollywood. More recently than not there are a lot of gorgeous women on TV who aren't a size 2 - like Callie from Grey's Anatomy or Ugly Betty. I do believe that these women are healthy, spiritually and physically because they aren't obese, they are legitimately curvy.

But some people who stuff themselves just can't get away with saying they are curvy or have big bones. Also, these ladies know how to dress for their size. You know what is really unattractive? Seeing fat spill over the waist of your jeans because you're trying to fit into a size too small, or seeing a bulging stomach through a tight fitted top - particularly when longer, looser wear is more in style now.

I think the point of this rant was stop bitching if you're so damn happy with your body, and get on a treadmill if you aren't.

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In my opinion girls can be beautiful in all shapes and sizes. However, if you're bony, and lacking in the weight department there can be serious health concerns. But also, if you're overweight, and eating excessively to conquer some sort of complex then that is not healthy either. The most attractive woman, is the one who has a beautiful personality, and who takes care of herself, physically and mentally. Health is important in gaining confidence. So those couch potato women can be warned, you're as risk of being just as unattractive as those girls who are skin and bones. Beautiful=Healthy. But in my book, a little more, is ten times more attractive than a walking corpse.

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Thin is so out.... dont u see the most beautiful people are fuller in body size... a fuller face looks much more youthful and beautiful than a skinnier face... i am not regualr sized and a lot of guys love me the way i am... skinny guys as well as fat guys like the fuller body size.. they like to have something to hold on to....and yes fuller sized women do have much more personality than a thin woman..they are not vain.....you can still be thick and be beautiful.... anyways true beauty comes from within

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wow, i must say that some of these people really dont like people that have just a little extra weight on their body. look at me, im still in high school, but i weigh 185. dont think i am a plus size because im not. i am, however, 6'1" and have a larger bone structure than a girl who is only 5'4". and yes, i do work out five days a week HARD. NO, i do not play basketball! i am trying to lose weight so i can be at the proper, healthy weight for my body and age, but it is really hard. i have dealt with this for my whole high school career, and maybe this will be the year that i have a nice body.
but another thing that bothers me is when slim, slender, or skinny girls say that they are too fat and attempt to pull away 'extra' skin and show you that they are too fat! they should be happy that God gave them those bodies that guys like. personally, i want a guy who falls in love with my mind and personality-then he can still love me for my figure.

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I'm still in high school too, as another reader said. I'm not fat, but all my friends are sticks. My mom says I'm skinny, and I know I'm not, but she is convinced I am and wont let me do anything professional (get a nutrionist, go to a personal trainer) because I play year round sports so she thinks I'm in good shape. However, how do you explain that all the guys my age go for the more attractive, skinny girls? I'd like to think that it is the maturity level, and as we get older, my body type will become more attractive, but is that it? I don't know what I should do. I want to love the skin I'm in, but when all my friends an still fit into clothes that they wore 6 years ago, it's hard to keep a high moral.

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